His appointment (Death of a dream, Pt 2)

Knowing that it is the LORD who opens and closes wombs, I went on hoping that He would open mine.  I rode the roller coaster of hopes and hopes crushed.  I made use of more pregnancy tests than I care to admit.  And cycle after cycle, this poem by Edith Lillian Young was one of the tools in God's hands to move me, little by little, to the place where I laid my wish list down and clung to Him alone for my joy.  How grateful I am for His grace which leads me into His arms of love!  He is good, all the time. 

Disappointment - His appointment, change one letter, then I see

that the thwarting of my purpose is God's better choice for me.

His appointment must be blessing, though it may come in disguise,

for the end from the beginning, open to His wisdom lies.

Disappointment - His appointment, Whose? The Lord's who loves me best,

understands and knows me fully, who my faith and love would test.

For like a loving, earthly parent, He rejoices when He knows,

that His child accepts unquestioned all that from His wisdom flows.

Disappointment - His appointment...Lord I take it then as such,

like the clay in hands of a Potter, yielding wholly to Thy touch.

All my life's plan is Thy molding; not one single choice is mine.

Let me answer unrepining, Father not my will but Thine.