In His arms

Choosing to SEE, by Mary Beth Chapman...painful, humorous, encouraging, challenging...both times I have read it, I have ended with a more earnest desire to share the hope I have in Christ with others, to trust Him wholeheartedly with the challenges He brings our way, and to rejoice that though a mess, He loves me.  Here are a couple of excerpts that I could identify with:

"Most people I know are quite fond of the apostle Paul, not because he was a superachiever who spread the gospel throughout the known world, but because he realized that his pains and limitations were what kept him dependent on Christ...He said that we carry around the knowledge of Christ like a treasure in 'jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us.  We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies' (2 Cor. 4:7-10 ESV)."

"I take a perverse pleasure in so many of the Psalms, and I am so absolutely grateful to God that He would include the wild writings of a guy like David, who clearly had his ups and downs.  I can relate with the pain and great sweeps of melancholy in the Psalms.  But I can also relate with the way David always returned to his hope in the Lord.  His pain was real, but so was his hope. And in spite of being slightly crazy, David know that the Lord God Himself knew him before he was born.  He is the One who will cause our stories to ultimately end secure and well, right in His arms."

Accidental Pharisee?

On Sunday we visited a church called Mars Hill with our nephew Ryan and his girlfriend.  I have listened to their pastor, Mark Driscoll, via podcasts on and off for years.  But Mark wasn't preaching this week.  A man named Dr. Larry Osborne did, and after being greatly encouraged by his preaching, I decided to look him up to see what else he has available online.  One of the first things I came across was introducing a book he has written titled Accidental Pharisee.  Though I want to keep my eyes fixed on Jesus, I was convicted that still, all too often, I fall into the very things he mentioned in his intro...here's a slice of it, pasted in blue (the rest can be found HERE). 

Here’s a brief list of six of the most telling indicators that we may have inadvertently started down the path of an Accidental Pharisee, looking down on others and trusting in our own righteousness.

• First and foremost is a deepening sense of frustration and disdain for those at the back of the line. Instead of a Jesus-like compassion for those who can’t keep up, we view them with cynicism and a cocky arrogance.
• The second warning sign is a spirit of exclusivity. When thinning the herd becomes more important than expanding the kingdom; or raising the bar becomes more important than helping people climb over it, something has gone terribly wrong.
• A third indicator is the addition of extra-biblical rules and expectations. Few of us would see ourselves as legalists. We think we’ve moved on from old school legalism because we no longer judge people by what’s in their refrigerator. But the spirit of legalism still runs strong. We now judge people by what’s in their driveway and how big their house is.
• A fourth symptom is a pattern of idolizing the past. Whether it’s the New Testament church or the scholars of old, we tend to give them a free pass for their failures. But the present day Bride of Christ and the current crop of leaders that Jesus has put in place are assailed for their blind spots, failures, and feet of clay. Like the Pharisees of old, we rip on the living prophets and then build monuments to them once they die.
• A fifth sign that something has gone wrong is a quest for clone-like uniformity. Jesus had room for Simon the Zealot and Matthew the Tax Collector. Yet sometimes, the more biblically grounded we become, the less room we have for anyone who hasn’t yet learned all that we’ve learned. The result is a circle of fellowship that’s tighter than Jesus’s circle of acceptance.
• The sixth and final indicator that we’re becoming an Accidental Pharisee is something called “gift-projection.” It’s the toxic belief that my calling is everyone else’s calling. It disfigures the body of Christ by insisting that ears become eyes and hands become feet. It looks like passion for the mission. But in reality, it’s chocolate covered arrogance.

Does any of that strike a chord with you too?   Together, let us lay aside the filthy rags of our own self-righteous haughtiness and gladly put on the robes of His righteousness.  

He has showed you, O man, what is good.
And what does the Lord require of you?
To act justly 

and to love mercy

and to walk humbly with your God.

~ Micah 6:8 (NIV)

26 minutes in...

About a year ago, I listened through a series of talks on marriage by a godly pastor named Steve Wilkins.  I have been thinking once again about the content from his talk about forgiveness...it was truly a wonderful talk, given at a family camp in California, and you too can listen to it by clicking this link.  Around the 26 minute mark, he notes that forgiveness costs us something. 

We know it cost God something, don't we?  Forgiveness cost God big time…for Him to be both just and the justifier, Jesus had to suffer and die on our behalf.  But oh the gains!  God could have stayed angry with us and we all could be facing His just wrath on account of our many wrongdoings.  He would have been perfectly just…He is the Judge and we have done wrong…there would be no wrongdoing on His part to make us suffer the due consequences of our sins. That is because He is God.

One of the often memorized verses of the Bible is John 3:16, which says: “For God so loved this world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.”  Now slow that down.  God SO LOVED.  He GAVE.  His only begotten SON.  Are you a parent?  Could you give your child to rescue rebels?  Would you even want to re-establish relationship with those who have betrayed you, lied to you, forsaken you, killed your messengers, and sinned against you in an overwhelming myriad of ways?  John was not kidding when he told us in 1 John 3:1 to “BEHOLD what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God!  Forgiveness wasn’t free for God…it cost Him mightily.  And He didn’t stop at forgiveness in the sense of wiping out  our liability for punishment with His love…He more than restored relationship by adopting us and bringing us into His family.  

He took initiative and died for sinners (not people who had begged for His mercy and totally cleaned up their act...people like you and me, still in our sins and not even caring a hoot about Him)...and we know that.  For those of us who have been forgiven by God, we also know we are supposed to forgive others as Christ forgave us. But have you ever been asked by someone to be forgiven and found it really hard to do?  Getting back to the 26 minute mark, Pastor Steve shed some helpful light: 

"It sounds simple, but it is really hard BECAUSE in order to do this, you’ve got to:

1. Give up the feeling of superiority that comes from being bitter against someone for a good reason.  It is a delicious feeling, and we have all been guilty of enjoying it. You have grounds for being really angry.  And your holy little soul has been damaged by Mr. or Mrs. Inconsiderate, and you take great inward pleasure in standing above them in your so called righteous judgments.  It is a delicious feeling to think yourself more holy than other people [and it destroys the church all the time because all of us like it!].  You know you are supposed to forgive when someone asks you to, but you delay it…”I just can’t talk about it right now” with puckered lip.  We put people off so we can feel superior for at least a little while longer.  It is a great wickedness.  We hang onto the offenses so that we can feel more righteous than they are.
2. Holding onto the hurts makes us feel like we have something to hold up as a reason for people to feel sorry for us.  Nobody appreciates me, nobody is thoughtful like me, nobody knows what I suffer…I feel sorry for myself and I like it when someone else feels sorry for me too.  If I let go of the offenses, I lose this power.

Forgiveness costs you something…it costs you your self righteousness and your self pity.  BUT, if you give up your self righteousness and self pity, you are going to be free of anger, and bitterness, and frustration and the poisonous spirit of revenge that drains you from the ability to love, and of peace and joy.  Forgiveness does cost us something, but when we understand the gain we know there is no greater bargain.  There is no substitute for mercy."

We can only do that by remembering the greater price that was paid by God for us all.  It frees us to love.  Notice that the things it costs us to forgive are self-focussed.  Doesn't God call us to consider one another, to lay our lives down, to take initiative to point people to Jesus that they might live by His grace?

Later in his talk, he said: "Nothing but repentance and forgiveness solves the problem, and when you do that you have a place where you can begin to rebuild on the right foundation, the foundation of our Savior and have the life you stopped thinking is possible." 

Amen!

The Good Part

Now it happened as they went that He entered a certain village; and a certain woman named Martha welcomed Him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who also sat at Jesus' feet and heard His word. But Martha was distracted with much serving, and she approached Him and said, "Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Therefore tell her to help me."  And Jesus answered and said to her, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things.  But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her." ~ Luke 10:38-42 

Observe:
*  Martha welcomed Jesus into her house. She was distracted with much serving. She approached Jesus, questioning Him and telling Him what to do. 
*  Mary sat at Jesus' feet and listened to Him.

Two people interacting with Jesus.  One chose the "good part."  Is Jesus opposed to serving? It depends.  Are we serving Him or serving idols of some sort?  Not all service is alike.  Is our serving like His serving or is our serving distracting us from loving God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength; and from loving our neighbor?  Jesus came to serve and to give His life as a ransom (Mark 10:45).   He was always about His Father's business, submitting Himself even to the point of dying on a cross..."not My will, but Yours, be done" (Luke 22:42). This kind of service requires us to listen, to sit at His feet.

Interestingly, the very next thing Luke records for us after telling us about Martha and  Mary is Jesus teaching His disciples to pray:

"Our Father in heaven,
Hallowed be Your name.
Your kingdom come.
Your will be done
On earth as it is in heaven..."

We too are called to be about our Father's business...Jesus teaches us to pray in a way that positions us at His feet...His name be hallowed, His kingdom come, His will be done!  Do we have our own agenda's, welcoming Jesus in only to advise Him to help us with our plans?  Are we distracted with our "serving"? Or are we choosing what Jesus calls the "good part"...sitting at His feet and listening to Him so that all our serving will be about His name, His kingdom, His will?

Accepted?

"He made us accepted in the Beloved." ~ Eph 1:6b

How much of our lives are spent trying to earn acceptance in some fashion?
*  Are we doing the "right" diet?  Should we even be on a diet? 
*  Are we wearing the "right" clothes?
*  Are we using the "right" make up in "right" proportions?
*  Are we sporting the "right" haircut?
*  Are we engaged in the "right" kinds of activities?

My children come to me and ask things like "Does this look ok?  Do my clothes match? What do you think of this hairstyle?  Do you think I am fat?"  And on and on.  Some of that is just part of the learning curve of figuring out cultural appropriateness, but largely there is the unstated admission behind it that I want to fit in, I want to be accepted.  They have the honesty to ask out loud what many only think inwardly, but unless you are the exception, we all have insecurities and fear of man issues that require us to hear and trust God's gracious word to us, or remain enslaved. 

God tells us that if we are His, He has already made us accepted in the Beloved.  The jury is not still out...the verdict has been rendered.  He has made us accepted in the Beloved!  Let those words sink in.  And share them with your children if God has blessed you with them.  They need to hear as much as we do that they ARE loved, they don't have to earn it.  They ARE beautiful, made by God as His image bearers, gifted to bear good fruits.  Is this the message they hear from you?

Let's live out of response to God's goodness to us...His love already bestowed.  Put off these enslaving worries and all the associated fears of man, and walk as children of Light.  That doesn't mean that anything goes with food and clothes and activities...but it does mean that these things are no longer governed by worries over being accepted or gaining approval or getting noticed. 
*  Eat with thankfulness for God's glory from those things He provides.
*  Adorn your beautiful God-designed body with clothes and make up and hair cuts and jewelry that aim to reflect the beauty of the Lord to others because He already loves you, and you are already accepted in the Beloved (note that a simple observation of God's creation indicates that God enjoys variety..we do not all have to look alike). 
*  And as far as activity goes, if we really begin to embrace the heights and depths of God's great love for us, we will grow in our desires to be about our Father's business because we will be wanting to be doing what He is doing right alongside of Him...our choices of how we use the gift of time He gives will begin to reflect more and more the mission of our God.  

What a privilege we have been given.  Let's not spend our days trying to win approval of others for ourselves....let's know we are already approved by the One that matters most and truly live.  "Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God!" ~ 1 John 3:1

He crowns us with His lovingkindness

We have a saying at our house when the tensions begin to rise, and selfishness is the spirit in the air (those two things tend to go together in my experience).  We take our turns, being the not fully sanctified lovers of Jesus people that we are...turns at being selfish, and turns at being the one to speak our saying.  "Breathe in love, breathe out gratitude." 

When we are practicing selfishness, we tend to view what is lacking, what we think we deserve, how we think others ought to serve us and how dare they not?  When selfishness is our operating status, we tend to see our "self" as the center...we view other people as aids to getting us what we want or obstacles in our way, and we treat them accordingly.  Tensions rise when self isn't getting what self wants at the moment. Do as "I" want, and all is fine, but cross me and watch out!  Either way, really, that is a problem.  Our heart is not right if this is how we are living.  And the solution, in part, is to remember WHO the center of life really is...

Psalm 103 begins with "Bless the Lord, O my soul; and all that is within me, bless His holy name!"  Bless who?  The LORD!  He is the center. This beautiful Psalm continues with: "Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits: Who forgives all your iniquities, Who heals all your diseases, Who redeems your life from destruction, Who crowns you with lovingkindness and tender mercies, Who satisfies your mouth with good things..."

"Breathe in love, breathe out gratitude." 

Remember the Lord, and forget not His benefits...when you breathe in His love, really and truly, how can you not begin to overflow with gratitude?

I suspect that at least most people who are raising kids hear the phrase "that's not fair."  Now occasionally, a true injustice may be occurring, but generally this is just a great big clue that the declaring child is revealing his or her own selfish heart.  I have heard this a lot lately, and I have begun to respond gently with something along the lines of  "you're right...hell would be fair, and instead you're getting mercy...you get a nice soft bed and food to eat and parents who love you and correct you...breathe in love child, breathe out gratitude."  I also suspect that those of us raising up kids are guilty too...I know I am.  Father please forgive me, and cause me to breathe in Your love. 

Ps 103:10 "He has not dealt with us according to our sins, nor punished us according to our iniquities."

He forgives us, heals us, crowns us with His tender mercies.  Oh may God open our eyes to Him, and replace our selfish hearts with hearts that are overflowing in praise to His Name.  May He make us more and more like Jesus, who did not come to be served, but to serve and give His life as a ransom. 

Just a kiss?

An excerpt from Douglas Bond’s book: 

Fathers & Sons Stand Fast  (pg 135)

“What’s the big deal?  It’s just a kiss.” So says the postmodern world you live in.  Wiser minds through the centuries, however, have not agreed. 

             

Renaissance scholar Desiderius Erasmus of Rotterdam (1469-1536), in his colloquy The Wooer and the Maiden, exposed the sexual impatience of a young man attempting to woo Maria, a chaste young woman who liked him but was wisely cautious.

His advances frustrated, the young man asked, “Shan’t I have anything from you to take with me?”

Maria replied, “This scent ball, which may gladden your heart.”

“Add a kiss at least,” moaned the wooer.

Maria said, “I want to deliver to you a virginity whole and unimpaired.”

The wooer scoffed. “Does a kiss rob you of your virginity?”

Maria cleverly replied, “Then do you want me to bestow my kisses on others too?”

The wooer was indignant.  “Of course not.  I want your kisses kept for me.”

“I’ll keep them for you,” Maria replied, and for that reason, “I wouldn’t dare give away kisses just now.”  She offered him a handshake instead and concluded, “Meanwhile, I’ll pray Christ to bless and prosper us both in what we do.”